


Beginning at the End

by Fenix21



Series: In My Silence 'Verse [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: AU, M/M, allusions to underage sex, caretaker!Dean, portents, undercurrent of angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-01
Updated: 2016-02-01
Packaged: 2018-05-17 12:59:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 620
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5870575
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fenix21/pseuds/Fenix21
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's the end of one road and the beginning of another with death and loss and an unknowable future hanging over their heads.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Beginning at the End

June 2006

 

'Storm's comin', Sammy.'

'Sam,' Sam croaked, 'and yeah. Yeah, it is.'

Dean nodded. It was hard for him to get use to 'Sam.' 'Sam' had never objected before. He wasn't really objecting now, just trying to remind his big brother that he wasn't the same person he had been. Not really. That wasn't all Dean was having trouble with either.

'It's okay Dean,' Sam said, as if he were reading Dean's mind, and who knew, maybe he was. But it wasn't okay, on so many levels, the least of which being just the sound of Sam's voice.

After nearly a month, Dean figured he'd be used to it, but something still took him off guard every time Sam spoke, either the inflection or rhythm or intonation. It was like he'd been deaf all his life, too, and not just mute, the trouble he was having getting words to sound just right. Sometimes it was just the sound of it. Dean had an imagined voice for Sam in his head, and the real thing just didn't match up. It wasn't bad. Sam's voice was nice, earnest, a little higher than Dean would have expected for someone as big and tall as his little brother, but it wasn't bad. It might be just that, now, Dean had to share it. Before, Sam had 'spoken' to no one but Dean, and now he was talking to the world. Sometimes he forgot, though. Sam forgot and would revert to signing at Dean or pushing into his space or grabbing hold of his face and just looking at him, deep and hard, in a way that said all that needed saying.

Sam was still silent as the grave during sex. He didn't even whimper, or whine, or runoff at the mouth swearing or praying, begging Dean to let him come in anything more than the soft, varied hitches and catches in his breathing that Dean had learned to read so, so long ago. And maybe that was a kindness, maybe Sam was doing it on purpose, because so much else had changed for them over the last few short weeks, he was trying to hold onto something that would make Dean feel safe and stable in a world gone mad.

'Sam,' Dean finally said and squinted into the near distance where the thunderheads were climbing high and the light was fading into that washed out quality it got just before a good cloudburst. The wind picked up and thrust chill fingers inside his open jacket. Beside him, Sam inched across the Impala's hood to press against his shoulder and hip and duck down a little, curling in toward Dean like he always used to when he wanted Dean to put an arm around him and pull him close.

'Use your words, Sammy,' Dean prompted, getting no objection at the nickname this time, but lifted his arm anyway so Sam could scoot under it and hunch into his side. 

'Don't need words for this,' Sam said softly. Dean gave a little snort of amusement, but something funny tripped and trickled down his spine at the pitch in his brother's voice. It was almost perfect. 

The wind gusted up and brought a brisk slice of unseasonal cold with it. Sam shivered. Dean tightened his arm.

'Yup, storm's definitely comin'.'

Sam didn't bother looking at the sky, and Dean could feel his warm breath feathering across the hollow of his throat as he sighed in something that almost sounded like contentment. 'Been storms before, Dean,' he offered quietly. 'We'll survive.'

'Yeah.' Dean nodded and let his cheek fall to rest on the top of Sam's head, eye still to the darkening sky in the north. 'Yeah.'


End file.
